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Dedicated to the Memory of Timothy

My Brother on Earth, Forever, My Brother in Heaven

This story begins in the early 1950s, in a small town in south Texas.

It was a quiet little place, or so it seemed to two small boy's just beginning to live thier lives. Tim was known as cotton top, because his hair was so white. The town was'nt far from the Guadalupe River where we loved to go fishing and swimming when we could. I'll never forget the night we were camping beside the river, and Dad shot a skunk that had wondered in close. The smell was bad before, but nothing like it was when it died. Well, needless to say we had to move to another spot. We always had fun at the river, sleeping in back of the station wagon, telling stories, laughing, watching the stars, and making funny noises.

I have heard it said that it was so humid there, you would have to stand in the Shower just to feel drier. Well, I don't know, but I remember Mosquitos so big, if you shot 10 or 12 of them with a shotgun, you would have enough for a meal. O.K., maybe not that big, but I do remember us walking to the bait store barefooted, and our feet nearly caught on fire from the hot pavement and ground. We would run a little ways, and then put our feet under the shade of a bush on the side of the road. Man, what an adventure! As I search through my memory of the past, there are a lot of wonderful pictures of growing up with my Brother. We sure had a lot of fun times, and maybe a few bad ones too. Some of them I would like to share in this story.

I recall Saturday afternoon Matinee's at the downtown theater, where the Lone Ranger Would ride again. We would sit there for hours it seemed, watching our Hero's. Seemed like it only cost $1.00 for both of us. And that included cokes, popcorn and maybe some candy. We would take our wagon, and gather up coke bottles in the alleys to get the money to go. Boy, how things have changed. But I suppose we lived for Saturday morning Cartoons. Howdy Doody, Andy's Gang, Spanky and Our Gang, and Tarzan. ( the one with Johnny Weismuller in it.) and so on. The room was always filled with laughter, especially if we were under one of Moms evaporator tents with Vicks Vapor Rub in it. And if the weather was good, you could always catch us playing Cowboys and Indians around the neighborhood with our six shooter cap guns, that only fired every other time. When they missfired, we would just make the sound with our mouths. It really was pretty realistic too, or so we thought. It really did'nt matter to the two of us outlaws. Just for fun, I recall both of us in our underwear, taking turns standing on a #3 wash tub in the middle of the street, stopping cars with a cardboard sign on the end of Moms broom handle. We would hold em for a second and then raise the sign and let em go, just like the big kids in school do at those crossings. Man , that was fun. -------------- for a while !!!!!

We were pretty little when Mom and Dad divorced. I guess I was about five and Tim was three. I really don't remember too much about it all now. I suppose that is what Time does to the memory after all these years. A scary thing happened after that though. We were visiting Mom and some other relatives, when we decided we were going to go visit this nice lady we had met, that lived on a farm. And we knew where it was in relation to where we were staying. About a mile on the other side of the six lane freeway. This all took place just outside of Dallas, and I think we were about 8 and 6 years old. We took off without anyone knowing, on a nice day, to go get a glass of tea at our new friends house. As we neared the freeway, we saw a great big pipe angled downward into the ground. And when we looked in, it was very dark, deep inside it. It was a large drainage pipe. We decided it would be fun to climb down inside and see where it went. So Tim started in first, going slow on his hands and knees, when suddenly his feet slipped and he started sliding down. He gripped the edge of the pipe, and stopped sliding. And when he looked at me I saw pure fear in his eyes, and I was terrified too. As fast as I could, I reached my hand out to him and braced myself, and pulled him out of that dark place. We never tried that again. But we did cross the freeway and the corn field and had tea with our friend. I suppose she called our Mom, because she drove up and took us back home to one of the worst spankings I can remember. That sure was good tea though.

We had great times together, and some good spankings together, but all that mattered to us was just being Brothers. It was a ritual for us at night to tickle each others backs, and see who could raise chill bumps the fastest. And we would take turns. As soon as the chill bumps came or you moved , it would be the other ones turn. I could always make chills come on him quick and then I could make mine last a long time. So eventually he would get tired and have to quit. But then we would make funny noises, you know, like blowing on your arm muscle,and just giggle untill we would get in trouble. But the more we tried to be quiet, the more we giggled. He would start laughing and then I would, back and forth untill we were out of control, laughing. They said our giggle box was turned over, and I guess it was. Sometime later, after our Dad remarried ,and our Mom too, We were told we were going to be separated for a while. Tim was going to have to go live with Mom, which lived a long way from us. We would not see each other for a long time. We had no idea why this was happening, and we cried and cried on that dreadful day when Tim had to leave. God, I missed him so, and wanted somehow to go find him, but I did'nt know how. This day in our lives reminded me of a very scary time, When I nearly lost him in the drainage pipe.

We got to visit each other in the summers, and we would catch up on things as best we could, but it was always painful to leave again. Finally, when I turned 15, I got a 57 Chevy for my birthday. I think Dad said later he got it for $800.00. Can you believe that? I wish I still had it today. Anyway, as soon as school was out, I went to see Tim. I had permission on this trip!!! We had so much fun that summer. Camping out on the river, smoking hollow vines till our tongues bled, skinny dipping, and going on dates. One night, we filled up a canteen with a mixture from Mom's liquor bar. It had everything in it, (wine , bourbon, scotch, and anything else we could find.) And we went to the river to drink it. We had a campfire going, smoking the vines again, and singing some songs we knew like, Sixteen Tons, and North to Alaska, and so on. Everything was perfect except the drink. It was so bad, we nearly gagged every time we took a sip. So what do you think we decided to do? I had no idea that stuff was explosive! When we were getting ready to leave, I took the canteen and was going to put out the fire. the instant that stuff hit the fire, It exploded!! Man, the flames shot straight up and I threw the canteen, flames everywhere. I thought I had set the forest on fire, But it quickly went out. We had more fun laughing about that night on the river. When I left to go back, I decided I was going to do everything I could to talk my Dad into getting Tim back home.

About six months later or so, it happened, Tim came home to live. We were so happy. I taught Tim how to play the guitar and we would sing and play for school functions and things. Things were good most of the time, but he did'nt seem very happy. He started not helping around the place and was becoming more and more rebelious and I did'nt know why. I realized many years later, it was because he was being compared to me and the things I did, and always being put down in small ways. I went into the military in 68 and slowly grew away from the family. Some get togethers were good but they were getting farther apart. We formed a band and started playing in the nightclubs. We even cut a record and it did pretty well. But that is where everything changed. We both got married and Tim quit the band, and started his path in life serving the Lord. I stayed in the night club business and was caught up in a world of make believe. I was making believe I had a good life. When my wife and I divorced in 1975, I went into a tail spin with life. I had lost my family, my self esteem, my dreams, everything. I felt totally worthless. So I ran, and I did everything you can imagine in the world of sin and darkness. There is not one Commandment I did not break. My Life had become a world of self destruction and evil.

Then in the early 1990s, Something was changing in me, and I realize now It was the Lord tugging at my heart, and it was very powerful. Stronger than my will, which had ruled my life for so many years. I sold out of the music business and began living a totally different kind of life away from the influences of night clubs. I had always known about the Lord, and believed the stories in the Bible. I didn't have the relationship with Him though, but that would soon change. Tim was back in my life, We had family get togethers in which Tim and his wife came to. It was so good, after all those years of no contact, to be back together. One night we were talking about the things of God and thats when the commitment to live for The Lord came. I have no doubt that Tim and his wife were instumental in showing me, the Hand that reached out and pulled me out of the darkness. I had already been saved by this time, but they showed me the relationship I was missing with the Lord. I see now that my Savior had put all of this together in a marvelous way.

I was there for Tim's first surgery to remove cancer that had invaded him. It went well and he recovered, but it was only the beginning. We all took a lot of trips together and were blessed tremendously everywhere we went. But every year, for six years, he returned to the hospitals for more surgeries. I recorded as many of Tim's songs as I could before time ran out. He loved and served the Lord most of his life and I only pray that I can serve as well as he did. Tim and I are separated again, but this time I know it's only temporary, and we will be together again, forever, because I will never forget the day that my brother on earth, became my Brother in Heaven. No matter how hard I wanted to reach out to save him again, I am comforted in knowing that the Almighty Creator himself reached out his arms and welcomed Tim home.

I wrote the poem below before Tim left us, and I hope it will Bless you. The Albums we recorded, are on the Music page and they are all Christian songs. I want to close in saying, To God be the Glory, Forever and Ever. Thank you Lord, for my little Brother.

BROTHERS

Once upon a time, not really so long ago.

God sent two boys to earth, and he Loved them so.

He gave them great smiles, and big hearts too.

He put inside them a special Love, that only God can do.

They laughed and played by day, at night they'd get tickled,

And when it was time to sleep, they'd lay there and giggle.

They tried selling rocks, and stopped cars in the street,

They were Brothers together, even talking in thier sleep.

Then one day without any reason, it seemed so unkind,

They were separated by Man, for what seemed a long time.

One Boy being driven away, visions blurred by tears,

Hearts torn apart, but not forgotten, seemed like a hundred years.

The Lord brought them back together, gave them music as a gift,

Meant to praise his Glory, but the world had taken it's grip.

One day the Lord called them, wanting them to meet his Son,

One Brother remembered his Love, the other turned and run.

Separated again by Man's desires, their paths grew wide apart,

One chased after darkness, One Loved the Lord with his heart.

God could not stand them being apart, He still Loved the one that was Lost.

One day while running so hard from God, He ran into the foot of the Cross.

Now the world can try anything, from sea to shining sea.

To separate them now, would be impossible to be.

Not Man, Gold, Disease or Death, can keep them from being One,

Now that these Brothers, are Brothers, Loving God's wonderful Son.

Once upon a time, not so long ago,

I sent two boys to earth, and I really Love them so.

Jesus

In Loving Memory

Tim

1952 - 2004

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